Confidence Tips From Readers

Until I read The Confident Woman, I was unaware of how critical it was for me to model confident attitudes and behaviors for my two teenage daughters. I now know that being a good mom is more than loving them and telling them what to do; I have to show them by everything I say and do EVERY DAY that I–and therefore they–am responsible for myself and my own happiness and what happens to me. Using Marjorie’s formula, "Never ever say yes to anybody automatically," I have shown them how to decide whether or not they want to go out with a boy, or babysit or spend time with some friends. From Marjorie’s advice to use feelings as "messages from your soul," I now show my girls how to notice how they feel when they are with different people. Do they feel better or less than? If it’s the latter, then maybe it’s time to spend less time with those people.

Treacy
Manager, University Media
San Diego, CA
50-something, divorced, two teenage girls

My biz partner and I photocopied pages from The Confident Woman to use in our employee packets for the new female employees in our company. We have even made posters with quotes from the book and hung them all over our offices. Following Marjorie’s advice, we’re making sure that some relaxing activities such as manicures, pedicures, massages, etc. are a reward for hitting certain business goals. To make sure that everyone follows through on this, we've had everybody in our company make a list of things that are enjoyable to them. And then we’re making sure that they do some of these things on a regular basis.

Lynn
Founder, CEO Internet company
San Francisco, CA
20-something, unmarried

Marjorie’s book has helped me to stop worrying. She has even helped me to sleep better at night. I just say no to any negative thoughts that come into my head, replace with my favorite word, and then find solutions later. Oh yes, The Confident Woman showed me how to look for solutions rather than focus on problems. Because of Marjorie, I spend more time doing what I want to do now because her book has shown me that it’s really not that difficult to ask my husband and children to do more at home. I have learned that it’s not enough to read the book and think about what it says. For good things to happen, I have to act differently.

Dora
Housekeeper
San Diego, CA
30-something, married, four children

Since reading The Confident Woman, I have made small, but significant changes in what I do at home and at work. This has made all the difference in the world. Following Marjorie’s advice, I have developed some House Rules and Work Rules which include: 1) Never saying yes to anyone without really thinking about whether or not I want to do it. 2) Playing the harp every day for just a few minutes to relax. 3) Knowing that just because my phone rings doesn’t mean that I have to answer it. 4) Figuring out what I like and want--which means doing less "shoulds" and more "wants." 5) Whenever possible, stopping to watch the sunset. Most of all, I feel great satisfaction in knowing that I am on a path to a healthier, more confident life.

Dolores, M.D.
Professor of Radiology
Del Mar, CA
40 something, married, two children

What I loved most about the book was that it encouraged me to really get to know myself better--to take the time to focus on what I like and don't like, in much the same way I do when I meet someone new. Every day I’m noticing (and noting down in a journal) what and who pleases me and doesn’t. I am so tickled by the process. Before reading The Confident Woman, I just went along with whatever any- or everybody else liked or wanted or did. No more! Now I’m finding out about who I am and you know what, I’m a much more interesting person than I ever thought. And the more defined I become, the more interesting I seem to be to others.

Nancy
Vice President, healthcare group
San Diego, CA
40-something, divorced, two children

I am just blown away by this book. It has changed my life and will certainly change others’. These are some of the things I now do as a result of reading The Confident Woman: 1) Spend less time with people who are not good for me (Who would have thought this was possible, let alone healthy!). 2) Not feel guilty when I do something nice for myself (I never considered this an option or a choice). 3) Wherever I am, surround myself with what is beautiful or meaningful to me (How comforted, calm and happy this makes me feel). 4) Make small changes in my life (I used to think that only major, difficult, big deal changes would make a difference). 5) That it’s God’s plan for me to become all I was meant to be (why did I think He wanted me to hold back?)

Shawn
Author of women’s health books
San Francisco, CA
30-something, unmarried

The Confident Woman provided us with clear steps to replace the negative thoughts with positive solutions and actions. The step by step techniques for saying "No", delegating, and becoming a "solution nut" helped us achieve the best results. When our excitement and enthusiasm for the business kept us there and not at the health club, it took The Confident Woman to remind us to take care of our bodies too. We moved an exercise machine into the warehouse and use it for afternoon breaks. The Confident Woman could be called The Confident Businesswoman.

Joanne and Irene
Founders/Co-Presidents, Greeting Card Company
San Rafael, CA